# DAY 16 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Girl watching the ocean

A few days ago I decided to take a day off. I needed a lazy day to allow my mind to recharge. My mind is been working over hours since the earthquake, constantly solving problems, thinking of what to do next, it’s even processing how to react to the environment around me. I can feel my mind needs a day where it doesn’t have to critically think about every little detail. A day where it can just breathe and rest. I needed a lazy day in bed. A day just for me, my dreams and my thoughts. And so I did.

But sometimes the worst place where you can be is in your own head. As soon as I had my day off sadness knocked on my door and crawled into bed with me and stayed there for a couple of days. It was like someone turned on a switch somewhere and all emotions were allowed to run freely through the room.

I feel alone

I know we will be okay, I know Villa Nangka will be okay, but I still felt awful. And although I know there are many people out there that love me and care for me, I felt so lonely. Loneliness is such a powerful and frightening emotion. It comes to you out of nowhere, and suddenly, you are immersed in a labyrinth of emotions.

I try to tell myself it’s okay. I’m only human and sometimes humans feel like crap. They feel sad, and they miss people who used to be so significant in their lives. I tell myself I am allowed to feel this way, I am allowed to be hurt. Because, at the end of the day, hurting is the only thing that will lead to healing.

I guess the thing about life is that you can’t skip chapters. That’s not how it works. You have to read every line, meet every character. You won’t enjoy all of it. You will see things that you don’t want to see, you will have moments where you didn’t want to turn the page. But you need to keep going. Because stories keep the world revolving. After a few days of thunderstorms in my head the sun start shining again. Without any announcement it just rocked up and started shining her special light.

Love Rose

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# DAY 12 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Building a new boutique hotel on Gili Air

The one thing that I have that nobody else has is me. My voice, my mind, my story, my vision. So I write and draw and build and play and dance and live as only I can do.

Love Rose

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# DAY 10 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Couple in Love

If you have a wonderful man, who helps balance your whole world. Who isn’t perfect, but is perfect for you. Someone who makes you laugh and sometimes drives you crazy. Who is your best friend and sometimes your only friend. Someone who sticks around when things get rough and hold your hand when you are scared. Someone who works hard & would do almost anything for you.

Someone who knows all of your darkest secrets but loves you anyway. Who makes your worst days not seem so bad. Someone who finds his own happiness equally as important as yours. Someone who challenges you to be better every day, while still loving you right now. Who never asks you to put your dreams on hold or to stop running, but who can also remind you to live in the moment and enjoy every second of now. If you are as lucky as I am to have a man like this, promise me you take good care of him.

 Love Rose

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# DAY 9 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Building a new hotel on a tropical island

The roof of the headquarters of our beloved Gili Shark Conservation Project is now completely gone. I have so much respect for our boys and our workers. Demolishing a building like this is not easy, especially not if you have to do it in this extreme heat. It’s a very interesting process to watch and every day I’m learning something new.

Looking back at the last two months, I’ve been learning a lot. About natural disasters, construction sides, demolishing teams, crowdfunding campaigns, humanity and last but definitely not least about myself. The earthquake thought me to be a person that is not afraid of being vulnerable. To be someone who’s brave enough to ask for help to carry the weight of the world with me.

To be a person who is not ashamed of being broken. Someone who admits and accepts that she needs time to heal and that’s okay. And most important of all: the earthquake thought me to embrace the sadness and the agony of being broken. To let all the emotions in and accept that these emotions are also a part of my life. My crazy beautiful life.

Love Rose

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# DAY 7 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Re-usable bottles in Indonesia

I love projects! I especially love to start new projects. There is just something magical about creating something new out of nothing. Today it’s one year ago that we – together with our amazing team – started our Plastic Free Paradise Project.

It was my dream to create a campaign that would focus on maintaining the beauty of our home, & implement sustainable solutions for the development of the Gili Air. I wanted to give something back to the island that gave so much to me and create a plastic free paradise for the generations to come.

Plastic Free Paradise Campaign

Our #PlasticFreeParadise campaign is a wholehearted project that we’re keep building up with new ideas. I firmly believe that all these little differences put together will lead us to a better life quality, better environment and better future.

I am honored to be able to help the next generation and to be able to make a little difference in this world. Never underestimate the small gesture, the small act, the small initiative. Remember little by little a little becomes a lot!

Curious what our PlasticFreeParadise campaign is all about and what we achieved in one year? Read more about it here.  Can’t wait to see what the upcoming year will bring!

Love Rose

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#DAY 6 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Pink flamingo swimming in the pool

And another roof gone! Now we have three beautiful destroyed villas with no roofs and a pink flamingo in the pool. To be honest I’ve seen better days but… I’ve also seen worse. I might not have everything I want, but I do have all I need. My life is far from perfect, but I feel blessed.From here it can only get better.

Love Rose

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# DAY 5 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Girl signing a contract

Big things are happening! A design can be so simple but that’s what makes it so complicate. Today we said yes to a proposal of an architect. Together with her team she will help us to design the new Villa Nangka. Very scary and exciting at the same time. Can’t wait to share the first sketches with you in 2 weeks’ time.

Love Rose

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# DAY 4 OF PROJECT CINLOC

Villa Nangka is Tripadvisor number 1

I woke up this morning with and saw the following notification on my phone: “Congratulations Villa Nangka, you are number 1 on Tripadvisor!” I can’t believe it. The situation is so complete surreal, I can’t stop laughing. Our little paradise that is completely destroyed is now – according to Tripadvisor – the most beautiful place on Gili Air. Life keeps surprising me every day!

One of the things that I learned in the last years is the importance of reviews. They can literally make or break your business. And I guess you know yourself as well how helpful reviews can be when planning a trip. Therefore I would like to ask you: if you ever stayed in our little paradise, please take a minute to leave us a review.

It will probably be one of the last reviews for a long, long time, but it will still be incredible helpful. With your help we can keep our rating up, while we work hard to rebuild our paradise

Step by step

Today is the first day of a new month. The first day of the last quarter of the year. Another day where a bit of the old Villa Nangka will disappear and we are creating space for the New Villa Nangka. As all our villa’s (expect our traditional bungalow) are total loss the first step of project CINLOC is to take all the buildings down. The Pool Villa is already gone and we are half way with taking down our house. Hopefully in 4 weeks are buildings will be gone and we can really start rebuilding our dream.

Love Rose

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# DAY 3 OF PROJECT CINLOC

The word Love on a Wall

My heart stopped beating for a second when I heard the news yesterday; a 7.7 earthquake rocked the Indonesian island of Sulawesi. It doesn’t only hit me because it happened in Indonesia, it hits me because I understand now what the word earthquake means. I can picture it in my head. I can feel it in my veins. Whenever I read about an earthquake before the 5th of August I felt sad but that’s it. Now everything is different. I experienced how a 7.0 earthquake feels and its more than terrifying.

My heart, my thoughts and my love are with the people of Sulawesi. And while I’m typing this I look up and I see that the roof of our house is completely gone. My eye get drawn to the word ‘LOVE’ written on one of the walls and I think by myself: even when this wall be gone soon, true love never dies, it only gets stronger with time.

Love Rose

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